Her sister struck it rich 3 years ago and while looking for an investment property in Pleasanton found this townhouse and offered to let us buy it instead because it was such a great deal, below market and all. I rejected the idea because it didn't make sense for me to be driving that horrendous Sunol Grade commute everyday to get to my jobs here on the peninsula everyday. Then you can buy it as an investment property they then so generously offered. A nationally syndicated radio financial planner thought it would be financial suicide given our financial situation, confirming my thoughts.
When I told her that I don't want to buy it because it will not be a wise thing for us to do, man, she went ballistic. Throwing furniture, screaming that I am ruining her only chance in life to own real estate. After suffering her rage day after day, I caved in and agreed to buy it just to get her off my back. As I was calling her sister's husband to tell him that we are going to buy it, she changes her mind and said no she didn't want it. She didn't want us to buy it just so that it would get her off my back. Guess that wouldn't look too good on her.
Well if Pleasanton is too far, hey let's start looking in the Sunnyvale area. For 500k all we could find was an ugly townhouse with less than 900 sf. There was not anything else with a garage for under 500k. Smallest houses less than 1000 sf were going for over 600k. Remember, that was the time when prices were at the height of lunacy. I said no way we are going to buy at these ridiculous prices. Price I said will come down cuz they are just too out of whack with reality. Her sister's husband disagreed, along with rest of the population. They and everyone else were saying that price never ever go down in the Bay Area and if you didn't believe that you were a laughingstock. They're not laughing at us now.
I bet the sister's husband a dinner that price will drop if not in one year then in two. A month ago I reminded him of our little bet and offered him double or nothing. I said Bay Area prices will be lower a year from now. He didn't think so because prices have fallen so much already, so we are on for another dinner.
I'm pretty confident that second dinner is in the bag. Unless of course the new Administration can pull off one miracle after another.
The thing that bugs me is that she never gave me any credit for making a good decision 3 years ago, to not to buy then.
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A house only can make money when the price went up. You need to pay tax, repair, and mortgage these will be easily add up to the rent money or much more. The only good thing about owning a house is you do not get to be kicked out by the landlord. You will be kicking out by the government if you do not pay tax. Or kick out by the lender if you miss your mortgage. Again thinking of your child, anything she can not get it for herself she has no right to demand on you.
ReplyDeleteFirst to be a good father and then a good son, husband or worker etc
Congrats on "saving" a lot of money. I'm in the same boat and am looking to buy probably in 1-3 years. I'm always open to suggestions (such as buying real estates), but I will need to see all the numbers and make sure they make sense. Anyone who hears "renting is throwing money away" and proceed to go buy a home without any research is a fool. When it comes to your financial security, people need to do their own homework.
ReplyDeleteThe housing discussion is interesting, but not important. You seem like a levelheaded guy. You shouldn't be yoked to an insane harpy. Get out and try to keep the kids, for their sakes.
ReplyDeleteAgree! House is not the problem. If it is not house it will be something else. She needs to take out on you on something. It just happens to be house now. I had been there. For us it was “ how many houses we should buy”. I got out. Life is good afterward. Again take good care of your child enjoy him give him a good life. He does not care if you buy a house. He cares do you love him or do you have fun together.
ReplyDeletePeople in the Bay Area, and perhaps in other expensive metros have a disease: real estate mania. They make housing into some surreal thing beyond what it really is; a place to live and store things like books and furniture. Its all tied to price and the fact that millions of people all live crammed into a small confined area, thus fighting tooth and nail over every scrap, further exacerbated by countless anti-development laws. Since having a home here means severe life changing sacrifices, houses get placed on a sort of mythical pedestal here and gain unworldly status and themselves become status symbols. I find this unhealthy. That your Wife got caught up in all of this is kind of sad and I wish you both luck and hope you can resolve your differences.
ReplyDeleteJust one idea: Yes, its expensive here. But most of the country isn't. Perhaps suggest saving up your money and moving somewhere else. I read years ago that SF/Bay Area is ranked as one of the worst cities for raising a family. Do some research.
I think slotmonkey said he is anchored to this area because of his job.
ReplyDeleteDon't be too sure about it though. There are other places with tech jobs, such as Austin, or San Diego, or Denver. Would the wife be willing to move?
i and my husband divorced over the house in texas. ~ $60,000. total it is not money or house make us unhappy. it is people . after i left him, i got myself a house in SF/Bay, i am happy. not because the house, but because i am free from him.
ReplyDelete"Don't be too sure about it though. There are other places with tech jobs, such as Austin, or San Diego, or Denver. Would the wife be willing to move?"
ReplyDeleteExactly. Add Raleigh Durham, Atlanta, and even Huntsville AL ( defense) to the mix. Nobody is anchored to one area. Like I said- homes in a lot of other areas are as little as 150k. It wouldn't take many years to save up a good 200k in cash, then move out. That's sure as hell what we're doing. Screw this area.The quality of life is terrible. There's more to life than spending it all on a house.
People choose their lifestyle. You say you are tied to the area because of your job, but jobs come and go, people change professions. If it was a house you really wanted, you could have made the choice to move somewhere affordable and do a differnt kind of job. But you chose the bay area, where owning a house is unrealistic. I think the house is just today's issue with you and your wife. You are on different wavelengths, and the cultural differences can't help. Even if she won't get counseling, you can go alone. You might get some insight into why you decided to air your dirty laundry in the blogosphere.
ReplyDeleteThe clients that I do work for are located here in the South Bay which took me years to develop. If I moved somewhere else it would take me years to get back to the current level of income. Besides I'm too old to start that kind of business from scratch again, takes too much energy.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your input.